Reality TV confession

First off, I hate reality tv.

There is usually so much screaming and fighting and it's already hard enough to avoid that in real life. So I don't watch these dating/singing/dancing/reality tv shows. I just don't.
There is one though that I really have come to love: The Challenge!

A bunch of young adults are pitted against each other to win money in the end. Sounds like a lot of fighting? It is! But seeing these people engage in numorous mental and physical challenges really makes me want to do more sports and get better at everything. To be on "The Challenge" you need to be fearless and athletic, both of which I'm definitely not. But I would like to be and this show really inspires me to push some boundaries.
And it's super addicting. I've become so much better at not binge watching shows and only watching 1-2 episodes (max level will power) but I literally watch 3 seasons of "The Challenge" in one sitting. Oh well. I  guess that's also a form of pushing boundaries.

Besides, I've realized that I could hardly do one push up. So I've decided to practice them and I'm up to five now (WHY IS NO ONE IMPRESSED?!?!).

What show weirdly inspires you to get better at something? What reality tv show do you enjoy (secretly of course!)?

Classic literature by women

I love classic literature, especially by women. You can learn a lot about the times (my favorite are books from the 19th century) and the role of women in those times. The only reason I was skipping "Jane Eyre" by Charlotte Bronte was its length. I don't mind reasing 600+ pages but if you try to read a book every two weeks then that kind of pagecount is definitely discouraging.

I started reading it a few days ago though and I love it. I love to know how we as a gender have progressed (or not) in terms of education, politics and in society. On one hand I get to appreciate how lucky I am and to be grateful for the opportunities I'm getting. On the other hand it makes me more critical of current issues (which I'm trying to get more involved in).

I don't think I'm going to be able to finish this book in two weeks. I just have a lot of other work to do and I need to socialize because I won't see my grandparents very often. 

But I would love for you to recommend me a classical lit book if you were really impressed by one. 

I wonder if some of you wonder why I even have this blog. If you don't, you won't enjoy this post.

The main reason I started this blog is to keep myself accountable for my reading goal (that worked soooo well, I'm not behind on anything AT ALL!). And that has really helped me through some slumps when I really didn't feel like reading and wanted to give up on this goal entirely. By the way, this is generally good advice if you have a goal. Tell someone about it. You instantly are more likely to meet your goal because you don't just secretly fail. I literally have never reached a goal if I didn't tell anyone about it. I always needed that external pressure and someone who motivated me other than me (even though I am my best cheerleader, I'm glad facebook can't read minds yet).

On the other hand, I'm documenting my thoughts and interests. I love it when after 5-10 years I dig up a diary and I can read what I thought at the time and compare it to how I feel about situations right now. And I know that in ten years I will look back at this blog and probably be embarassed but that's just part of the fun to be honest.

Of course I would love a steady viewership, simply because it's more fun when you know someone's interessted or joining the conversation. But I would be writing this even if no one was watching.

I didn't go to any form of school this past year. For the first time in my life since I was six I didn't have to learn anything or had any assignment deadlines. And I didn't like it. I think to every human learning is simply an essential part of life and if you stop you become unhappy. That's maybe part of the reason I started reading so much.

Anyway, I remembered hearing about this website when I was in college where you are able to take courses on nearly anything: IT, history, journalism, graphic design etc. And a lot of them can be taken for free.

It's called coursera.org

I used it for when I had to learn a few programming languages in a short amount of time and it was great. You have weekly assignments and video lectures. At the end you are able to buy a certificate but that was never my intention.

If you feel like you want to learn a few new skills, go check it out.

Goals are hard

I live in Berlin and I love it there. But I sometimes need to recharge my batteries. Luckily, half of my family lives in the countryside. I will be working at a Coffee shop there (ironically on an ostrich farm, I hate birds) and trying to write more: More blogposts, more on my book, just generally more!

I think I have to keep myself accountable. Because just saying I want to write more is such a vague goal that in the end I don't achieve it. In fact, I usually write even less. I love the human brain!

So here it goes:

I'm going to write 2-3 Blogposts a week in the next 4 weeks (I think that's how long I'm staying there but I'm not sure yet). I'm going to write 1 page a day for my book and I only get to slack off twice a week (come one, I have to set realistic goals here).
I'm also going to write a topical essay once or twice a month. This is because I really need to practice writing. I would love to write and be good at it. But especially in English it's just kind of meh.
On a side note, I'm also going to try to meditate more because I often skip a few days. But it makes me feel so much better, so no skipping days!

Leave me hate on twitter if I fail!

Review

Hey Guys,

it's me, having ideas again.

I love watching tv shows and I often find myself thinking moderately funny thoughts while watching. So I thought it would be cool to review episodes of a series... But I don't know wich one.

I would love for it to either be a current show where week to week we talk about it. Or a classic one, a must-have-seen show, that most people love or love to hate.

I have two shows in mind that kinda fit both categories. But I'll have to watch them again completely which can be a drag and also discouraging. I want to hear your ideas before I reveal what I was thinking of.

6 George Orwell - 1984

I'm way more active on social media than I usually am. I have a twitter account now (@piepoetry) and I'm generally not one to hold back anything personal anyway. Well, that might change.
1984 had a recent rise in sales right after Trump got elected and because I hate to be left out I bought it as well.

It takes place in London, part of the totalitarian state Oceania, where Big Brother is watching you. We get to know Winston who is in great danger because he doubts his party and the methods it's using to keep its residents in check. He involves himself in a secret love affair and with a group called The Brotherhood who wants to destroy the party.

George Orwell (whose actual name is Eric Arthur Blair) really emerges the reader in this grim world. He explains in great detail how they change the past by editing every piece of information until it matches their current motives, how they simplify the language, how they keep the masses uneducated, how everyone knows it can't be right but goes with it anyway, how good propaganda can manipulate people and why it is so important to care. Of course this is fiction but I do see the ties to recent events. Orwell likes political writing and he does it well. He combines creativity with a fair warning.

It definitely made me realize that I often disagree with policies but think "well, what am I gonna do about it". And it shames me, really.
This book is engaging and it at least made me cover all my front cameras. It's definitely worth the read and it made me want to join a disscussion group to really fathom all  the details and themes in this book.

I give it 9 out of 10 CreepyTrumps. We're all doomed!

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I'm also really behind with my blogposts and I'm trying! I'm currently trying to write a book on my own but I often lack motivation or stamina. If you'd like to know what it's about, let me know. I could propably also use your help. You can contact me over instagram or twitter. xoxo

5 Oscar Wilde - The picture of Dorian Gray

First off, I'm really sad Oscar Wilde only wrote one novel. How dare he leave me hanging. He was in prison, shouldn't he have had enough time to write another one? Also, if you put someone in prison for being gay, is prison really the best place to put them (dropping-soap-scenarios, you know what I mean)?

"The picture of Dorian Gray" was also a recommendation from a friend and I'm really glad he thought of me because it definitely ranks with my favorite books of all time (I think second/third place).

Dorian Gray is a young, inexperienced boy and meets an artist, Basil, who worships him deeply and needs him as a muse. Through Basil he meets Lord Henry Wotton who thinks only pleasure and beauty makes life worth living (I do too, but for me that means pizza). Lord Henry puts all kinds of ideas into innocent, sweet little Dorians head and Dorian realizes how beautiful and captivating he is to other people. After Basil gifts him a picture of himself, Dorian wishes that the picture should age instead of him. Well guess what... 

He meets a young actress, Sybil Vane, who he intends to marry but after she puts on a bad peformance he looses his interest and she kills herself (ok, condensing the story like this makes it sound crazy). That changes Dorians life and things happen that I won't tell you about because I spoiled enough of the story! 

It has a lot of references to other literary pieces and to antique history which is genious and really made me look up a lot of names and background stories. But it didn't feel forced and I understand how this is a classic. My highlight were always dialouges that included Lord Henry and I did mark some interessting quotes. There are a lot of conversations and I think it's because Oscar Wilde was more into writing theater pieces.

I loved it. 

Ten out of ten hot dudes!

4 Jean-Paul Didierlaurent – The reader on the 6.27

I am behind on my blog posts because I underestimated the work that comes with also writing about what you read.

Guylain Vignolles hates his job at a book pulping factory, so he steals a few pages of what is left of the books to read them out loud on the 6.27 train as his higlight of the day. One day he finds the diary of a woman which he falls in love with by reading it on the train.

The reader on the 6.27 was recommended to me because one of my favorite book is "The Reader" by Bernhard Schlink. So I was excited and maybe I got my hopes up too high to be objective. Since it's a french book I did know the book was going to have a really romantic, honest voice much like "Amelie". But I felt like there was constant repetition, like we didn't already understand Guylain hated his job and the book pulping machine. It's often used as an artistic device but in this book it seemed clunky and unnecessary to me and a lot like Mr. Didierlaurent was either short on pages or really drunk. While the characters were well-rounded, I didn't come to like the whiny main character. I only appreciated the guy in the wheelchair whose legs got ground up in the pulping machine and recycled into books that he was collecting. But instead of helping this poor guy move on Guylain was withholding some of those books to keep wheelchair man busy. Yes, you're saving him from not having a purpose but you're also keeping him from finding a new one that doesn't focus around his tragic accident. WELL DONE.

So I was already over this book by the end of the first half. I understand that some people can really appreciate it and its story and maybe I just had too many expectations in the beginning. A French production firm already bought the movie rights and I can definitely see this as a good movie. I would watch it because all in all I did like the idea of the book.

I'll give it 4 out of 7 Baguettes.

So I've made the huge error of reading 4 books at a time, getting frustrated and then watching 2 seasons of Gilmore Girls. A show that in no way represents my taste in tv series but rather how much I appreciate family drama that I'm not involved in. Also, I had a great book idea where humans land on earth 66 billion years ago and eradicate dinosaurs with their arrival, making the world fall into an ice age and then leaving again, 'cause we're dicks. I seriously started writing that! But I'm not setting aside enough time for concentrated reading. Mostly because my grandma is visiting and I don't have the heart to tell a god-fearing person I'm writing fiction about dinosaurs.